Debunking Karma (With KARMA QUOTES)
For all the Sandra’s out there
If you look the word Karma up on the Internet you’ll be given all kinds of meanings, definitions, and stories from Buddhism and Hinduism and you’ll be told how Karma works, but not really because then you realize how confusing it is when you really think about it.
What is Karma?
Like what is it actually?
Is it an energy, a philosophy, or something else, where does it come from, and how can it make me come back as a piece of broccoli?
We’ve all heard of Karma before, this Universal point scoring database that keeps track of all our collective rights and wrongs, across all of time and space, and then shoots them back at us, with some kind of Universal Steven Segal Aikido Magic!
HA-YA!
But no one ever questions it, at least not Sandra!
We do something good, and something good happens to us, we do something bad, and something bad happens to us. And this happens across lifetimes too, allegedly!
Although the more modern Western Sandra version of the story takes on a somewhat more nice and vegan-friendly version of the original idea and usually only operates on a per-lifetime basis.
What goes around, comes around.
Is this Karma?
The short answer is yes, Sandra, but no.
Well actually it’s just a stupid thing we say and the Internet is absolutely filled to the brim with these Karma Quotes that are written by Sandra for Sandra’s.
Wait, who the f*ck is Sandra?
She’s the mommy blogger that feeds this comfy-sounding Karma narrative by buying Karma Quote calendars, t-shirts, and coffee mugs, and she needs to be destroyed!
Think of Sandra as Karens better looking younger sister who is into Yoga and crystals and raw milk.
I present to you;
Debunking Karma (With KARMA QUOTES)
Why?
Because Karma (the way we know it today) is dumb and childish and so is Sandra.
So we’re just going to trick Google into sending this article a bunch of traffic (idiotic Sandra’s, searching for the words “Karma Quotes” instead of asking what it actually is and if there is any basis to it)!
So here ya go, modern-day truth seeker, Karma Quotes right down your gullible throat, all the while debunking what we are told Karma is.
Life is a boomerang.
Wow, deep.
First I will quickly and not so eloquently debunk this idea of karmic reincarnation, that if you do a really bad thing, you know, kill your neighbor and have sex with his wife, not in that order necessarily, you’ll come back as an Oak tree or a 5 legged cockroach as punishment.
If you have done something terrible and you’re now supposed to come back as a 5-legged cockroach, how is that even a punishment when you don’t have the brain and awareness to know that you are now a 5-legged cockroach, or that you should even be bummed out about it!?
Seems like a pretty stupid punishment to me.
And yet the Internet is filled with bad explanations about Karma using this exact karmic reincarnation story!
Why use common sense when you can just read another excellent quote about Karma, you dirty little truth seeker!
People who create their own drama, deserve their own karma.
Great on a t-shirt that one!
Also from the wonderful make-believe fairyland that the elves and Sandra inhabit, you get to do unspeakable things to your neighbor's wife, then you kill him, or in reverse, I forget, and instead of rotting in prison, if you just like, make your karma better, or clean it or something, you end up marrying the wife, and you both sail off into the sunset living off the dead husband's life insurance.
Amazing!
But don’t take it from me, that’s from 5 Steps to Karmic Cleansing!
But what if you can’t undo the bad karma?
Do you live your life working in a Siberian prison camp instead?
And then what happens?
What happens when you eventually die?
Do you get teleported into that cockroach egg and reincarnate with only those 5 little legs for a bit of extra suck-y-ness that lasts a whole 30 days?
Silly, right?
Same as coming back as an oak tree, donkey, flea, water rat, goldfish, or magpie.
Do you really think that after you kill Ned Flanders and bang Maude, you get to live life as a hermaphrodite Oak tree, for a thousand years, just sitting there with zero awareness and that’s the karmic punishment is it?
Or you could just cleanse your karma and come back as Chris Hemsworth?
Stupid ideas for stupid people like Sandra.
Hey! Judge Judy! Can I leave my 101-year prison sentence 99 years early because I help Bubba with his spelling?
Amazing!
Be honest, like karma it will eventually come back to you.
It will come to you in 30 minutes or it's free.
The inverse is just as silly if you haven’t figured that out yet.
How are you, a 5 legged cockroach supposed to evolve and progress back into a human, let alone, some God-like enlightened deity surfing Vanilla milkshake waves in Nirvana?
It’s not like cockroaches have so many options at their disposal for what is a karmic right or a karmic wrong, it seems like all they do is eat, sh*t, f*ck, and make more of themselves.
As a cockroach, how are you supposed to navigate the karmic snakes and ladders world of karma?
Are you supposed to donate the bit of dried-up cat food that you found under the fridge to the local 5-legged-cockroach GoFundMe, and then through the mystical powers of VooDoo-Yoga you reincarnate into a rich ladies purse-dog or Michael Jackson's monkey from that time before we knew he was a pedo?
It makes no sense…unless you love quote's like these!
Karma. Always there, always watching.
Creepy.
I'm going to prove to you, and all of the Oat Milk drinking Sandra’s out there how sill the modern idea of Karma is:
Helen Keller
Helen Keller was a well-known American author that became blind and mute before her second birthday. At 19 months of age to be precise!
So what happened there exactly Guru-San-dra?
Karma just had to catch up because it was running 19 months late?
Or did she kill the family's pet cat at the ripe old age of 1, and so karma boomerang-face-punched her into a blind mute?
You can’t sit there and say there and say ‘Karma is a law, it’s a Universal law of quantum pazazz’, because I can show you it doesn’t work like that just as easily.
How people treat you is their karma, how you react is yours.
Powerful.
How about, Karma is the exact same idea as Christianity?
No?
Really?
God is always watching, you’ll go to Hell if you do that.
Did we forget that one?
When Christians say to do good, it's the same thing as Karma.
The Muslims say to do good, the Jews say to do good, and come to think of it, our laws are all about doing good. You can’t lie, cheat, steal, or kill.
Interesting isn’t it?
Do good, and good will come to you.
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